dankpelt said what

Reading this means you're at least smart enough to go down to Kentucky, show them fire, and be their god.


You Know What Tomorrow Is

In the spirit of what tomorrow is (it's Election Day, and probably the day at least one of you should change your underwear. You know who you are, cheese-crotch.) I thought I'd get boring and semi-political for a second. Here are some super quotes from the fuckhead that's hopefully on his way out the door. Take a peek, and think about this on your way to the polls: Do you want a president, or a guy that makes fucking Yogi Berra look like a grand champion of the linguistics world?

"The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country."
- George W. Bush

"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
- George W. Bush

"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and
that one word is 'to be prepared'."
- George W. Bush

"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in
the future."
- George W. Bush

"The future will be better tomorrow."
- George W. Bush

"We're going to have the best educated American people in the world."
- George W. Bush

"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."
- George W. Bush

"We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a
firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe."
- George W. Bush

"Public speaking is very easy."
- George W. Bush

"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the
- George W. Bush

"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
- George W. Bush

"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
- George W. Bush

"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our
- George W. Bush

"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the
impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
- George W. Bush

"It's time for the human race to enter the solar system."
- George W. Bush

Something to chuckle about at the very least. Admittedly, the politic-in' isn't my cuppa tea... but if you smile at things that lean (more than) slightly to the left, check out Phil's Blog. Oh, and thanks Scotty for "spamming" this political "junk" to my inbox! As you can see, it's getting some use.

Now, to drag this out further and enrage any Republican douche that might still be reading this, the aforementioned Scotty also emailed me this list:

GENERAL Republican beliefs:

1. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad
guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy
when Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy
when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden"

2. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is
communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is
vital to a spirit of international harmony.

3. The United States should get out of the United
Nations; our highest national priority is
enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

4. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her
own body, but multi-national corporations can make
decisions affecting all mankind without

5. The best way to improve military morale is to
praise the troops in speeches while slashing
veterans' benefits and combat pay.

6. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents
won't have sex.

7. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our
long-time allies, then expect their cooperation
and money.

8. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound
policy. Providing health care to all Americans is

9. A President lying about an extramarital affair is
an impeachable offense. A President lying to
enlist support for a war in which thousands die
is solid defense policy.

10. Government should limit itself to the powers
named in the Constitution, which include banning
gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

11. The public has a right to know about Hillary's
cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record
is none of our business, nor are Dick Cheney's
task force discussions with energy industry our
business either.

12. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a
crime unless you're a conservative radio host.
Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for
your recovery.

13. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital
national interest, but what Bush did in the 1980s
is irrelevant.

Sorry this went on for so long. I sincerely hope all of you go excercise your right to choose who you feel is the best candidate - whether it be the Elephant or the Donkey to emerge at the top of the heap, proud, majestic, ready to be the puppet of the people that really control the country... I just hope I don't still need this bumper sticker:


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